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Tuesday, April 29th, 2008
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7:16 am - Up with the birds
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Pigeons don't sing do they? Who is that. I know there is only like one tree in all of Tenderloin, where are they? They sound like real birds, like pretty birds.
I had a lot to say, but now I have nothing to say. I think I am better with thoughts, at night. I have very few thoughts in the morning. Besides I need more coffee, but that would entail getting up.
Yesterday the prose poems turned into a one line after another looking poem, which may have been an accident, but I am starting to get bored, I like when things evolve into something else. I was reading my unicorn poems again, and I think they are stupid, why does anyone like them? It is too bad that muxtape thing you can't save different ones, I guess i can keep changing it.
I was reading Kathy Acker and in the middle of all this crazy sex stuff she starts discoursing on like economic history, very interesting, but I wonder how much she really knows and how much is bullshit. Or like how liberal political types start ranting about these 2 facts/ideas they have but you just think they don't really know more than those two things, or just have like a superficial knowledge, I crave a deeper knowing. I was at my friend's art show and started talking to her space-sharer artist and I didn't realize it until I said it, but I want to study art theory, she started talking about how all the artists are into Derrida, or you see references to them a lot, and I'm like Oh Poets too! I also didn't realize until I said it, I have been craving art like crazy! Like when you really need a drink and you have one, or you really need a cigarette and you have one, like that. That relief feeling. When I told her I'd been having this feeling, but I'm not even an artist, she was so happy! Says most people that go to art shows are artists themselves and it is nice to meet someone who is not who loves art. Too bad I'm not rich. Funny how Poets think we are the only ones that only poets read poetry etc, but seems to be true with artists, and Manny told me the same thing about bands, the only people that show up at his shows are other bands, and they all go to each others shows. The thing with artists and musicians is there is a chance that they could "make it" become rich etc. That is not a possibility with poetry. And I have been craving a rambling post!
www.swarupachavan.com
www.imipolex.org/paintings
www.aplombfineart.com
www.lisachou.com
www.steven-weinberg.com
www.pink-cheese.com
www.mesart.com/alibaske
www.seamuskiel.com
www.kristinaq.com
aaaaah don't you feel better!
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| Monday, April 28th, 2008
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12:13 am - I want to hear yours
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| Thursday, April 24th, 2008
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10:10 pm
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Does any one else every Sunday say how the fuck am I going to get through this week? And then every night how the fuck am I going to get through tomorrow? One method lately is writing these poems when i go into the office, but lately my boss has been there early asking me questions, and I have to do work. and I feel so irritable all day because I can't write my poem. But today I wrote on lunch break and I was so into it, actually it sucked really bad that I kept messing around with it, trying to help it, that I was totally late coming back from lunch. No one said anything tho.
I had a dream I was smoking cigarettes. Like a chimney, maybe like 12 in a row! In real life I would have barfed. I had another dream that i had to organize reorganize, and I couldn't it was just impossible, there was nothing that could be done nothing at all. And I was thinking so hard, about a solution, so hard I was thinking but there was no solution, and I woke up with a splitting headache.
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(2 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, April 17th, 2008
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5:45 pm
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8:14 am
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| Sunday, April 13th, 2008
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10:50 am
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| Sunday, April 6th, 2008
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6:58 pm - Peach or Blue?
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| Wednesday, April 2nd, 2008
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10:06 pm
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I have a new Subscriber Identity Module! If only I could figure out how to put it in...
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, March 27th, 2008
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7:34 pm - Just like Radiohead!
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Dear Reader,
We at Fence love Radiohead, and so jumped at the chance to buy their newest album (I'm so old I call it an "album") at the price of our choosing. One of us paid $1 for it; another of us paid $17 for it; these seemed like fair prices. We have heard some paid two months' salary.
And now we're offering a similar opportunity for you to choose your own price for subscribing to Fence (or re-upping your current subscription). It's very important to us that Fence have readers--that the work inside Fence have readers, really--and so we want you to pay us whatever you want for your year's subscription.
All you have to do is go here http://www.fenceportal.org/support/ and click on "donate," then choose your level. Payments are processed by PayPal (it's free and easy to set up an account if you don't already have one: http://www.paypal.com). Anyone who chooses to pay $300 or more, god bless you, will, as always, become a lifetime subscriber, and receive a receipt for your tax-deductible donation.
This offer will be good from now through April 30th. If you take us up on it you will receive your brand new Spring/Summer 2008 issue of Fence sometime in May.
Thanks!
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(comment on this)
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4:13 pm
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| Wednesday, March 26th, 2008
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8:52 am
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| Wednesday, March 19th, 2008
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10:27 am
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Ever since finishing Erin Moure's O Cadoiro, every other book of poems I've been reading I really want to just be reading Erin Moure's O Cadorio. Everything else I'm reading, modern, just seems so empty.
as i do not wish to speak my ache
to anyone for i know well they cannot
give me console more than i can consolation give.
And consolation already i have given me
that i will set aside for thus i state my wish
to die in ache as anyone would die
unconsoled as i am unconsoled today
and this death better for me would be
than living with such ache un
rivalled that never was before and this i know.
And better this and better for my good
to soon die and they will never know
for what and whom i die and that i ever was denied.
www.anansi.ca/ocadoiro/postface
this poem is from #144 on the list.
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(comment on this)
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| Tuesday, March 11th, 2008
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7:59 pm
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| Saturday, March 1st, 2008
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9:05 am
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My plan is that I have finished the Unicorn poems, 60 of them. I sent them out as a whole book manuscript. If that is rejected maybe I will try publishing small chapbooks, The Unicorns 1-20, 21-40, 41-60! I have three chapbooks in that case! Now, since I am "done" I am not going to write any more unicorn poems, although I am going to continue writing "unicorn" poems but they are not going to be unicorns, they are going to be something else, maybe dandelions. Maybe it will be more political. Heard on the radio this morning: "Presidents do not pump their own gas" and "There is no such thing as a Kurdish nation."
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(7 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, February 28th, 2008
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10:28 pm
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| Sunday, February 24th, 2008
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11:18 pm
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Did anything happen on tv tonight that I should know about for the water cooler scene tomorrow?
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(comment on this)
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1:19 pm
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| Monday, February 18th, 2008
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12:01 pm
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I always meant to read an Alain Robbe-Grillet novel.
Just because it is year of the mouse does that mean I have to have a mouse? And thinking of all the rats attacking me dreams I used to have when I was younger, and wondering why I am not having nightmares about it crawling on me or eating me. And then I had a nightmare about a poltergeist, in a hotel, and the hotel room kept changing into different realities depending on which door you entered into it from. Probably just because I watched Fanny and Alexander last night.
Now that I have an extra day off, I am actually paying attention to the world, and the world is pissing me off. Searching about the Danish riots and find that a Danish police officer is quoted as saying: "We don't know why they're rioting. I think it's because they're bored." Huh? Who riots because they are bored?
And then I was listening to some sort of British talk show on the radio, I think it might have had a conservative slant, which was confusing because I tend to think it is only Americans who are dumb asses. But they said, it was so weird I wrote it down "When you were committing crimes did you feel responsible for those crimes or did you blame society?" If someone asked me that I'd've punched them. if I was a criminal. What a stupid question. And then there was the phrase "rioting at the drop of a hat" !!!? Like, why can't they just behave?
I'm bored, I'm going to go riot.
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, February 7th, 2008
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12:36 am
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And why do journalists write Mrs. Clinton instead of Ms. Clinton? Does she want it that way? I keep picturing a little old lady in curlers and house shoes when I see "Mrs." Yelling at me about required minimum distributions because she is 70 1/2 - or maybe that is just my dayjob.
I am year of the mouse and tomorrow I start my very "special" year! I had been thinking of calling in sick, as I think every day, but there is going to be dim sum craziness! How could I possibly miss?
And how cool is liking sylvia plath now? So cool! and what a bracelet collection!
I had a bracelet, shiny wood from Hawaii, but it was hard to write with, and do things with the mouse pad, so I took it off, and then later, I put it in my desk drawer. Maybe I should wear it and read slyvia plath, and stop with all the "production" business-stuff. Or oh. When I am a teacher, I shall wear bracelets.
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(3 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, January 28th, 2008
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12:05 am - Dispatch 733 from #2599
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The Hope Blister's Smile's OK is perfect rain music. I suppose it probably will never stop raining, until maybe May. I am starting to adapt myself to it, but think there has got to be a better solution to wet heads, than umbrellas. I'm thinking raincoats with hoods maybe.
Saturday I felt so fatigued, after I taught my class, passive tense, bombed! It was my last class to teach before I get a real job, and it was awful! I think though, passive tense is really advanced and my students were not so much. I asked someone to tell me the verb in the sentence and she told me the adjective! There was a lot of staring and blinking. Then I went home, ate, and fell asleep, and though I wasn't sleeping the whole time, I laid/lied? in bed for 4 hours utterly exhausted. I stared at the wall for like an hour pretending I was a depressed, unemployed character in a Tao Lin story and that made me feel better slightly. But god I am so fatigued. Even still.
Today I went on a reading in public marathon. Four different places. Three cafes and one library. And I got a new brightly colored library card, designed by an 8th grader, Gabriela. I wonder who she is. The unfortunate thing is my library card number has changed. Now I have to memorize another 14 digits. It used to be 21223025134001. That is the last time I will ever type that.
I was reading right by the Information desk and heard this guy telling the librarian. "I need to get your number, because I'm going to have to take you to court." Huh? Turns out he couldn't get the computer to work. The librarian was amazingly patient with the man. I would not have been.
I enjoy overhearing things. In the next cafe, I overheard two men talking about who they were going to vote for. One said he couldn't decide between Obama or Clinton, it depends on who you believe, he said. I think the only one I believed has dropped out.
Then I overheard a woman yelling into her cellphone. "One, Me! Two, Self! Three, I! Bye."
Oh, and my name right on the cover. I think Logan will probably send it to you for nothing, but give him money anyway. His prices are always so cheap! $3.50!! Crazy. And there are much better poets than me in there. Like everyone.
Why are sirens so loud? I have my fingers in my ears in my house!
I have no idea how I am going to make through a whole nother week of work. I think I am on the verge of a precipice. Like I'm gonna jump or I'm gonna start throwing rocks.
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